I got at least 3 emails yesterday that were sent out to the entire class saying, "When's tomorrow's final?" "What time is the final?" "When and where is the final?" Uh, check the final exam schedule and/or the class syllabus. It isn't like we've been discussing the Friday the 13th final exam at 9:45 AM in class at all for the past 3 weeks either. Idiots.
"Oh, hey, you missed it! The cops were here a few minutes ago."
"Were they here to arrest me for fucking the turtle?"
No more context on the last one will be given.